In the vision of the Balinese, to choose his words is essential to preserve the balance in the relationship. So, raise your voice and get angry about them is inconceivable. And aggression, when they are confronted with, is unsustainable.
As the ritual of passage to puberty, in Bali, every child is slightly grinding the six teeth of the upper jaw. This act symbolizes the entrance into the age where being in the ability to create, he became a manager and leaves behind him six impulses: anger, jealousy, arrogance, greed, lust and attachment. His attention is drawn to what comes out of his mouth: the words.
“As long as there is a child, he can say what he wants. But as soon as he goes through this ritual, he becomes responsible, and will now have to pay attention to what he says, ” explains Catherine Chouard, fascinated by the wisdom of Balinese to which it is initiated over the past ten years.
Because, in the vision of the Balinese, to choose his words is essential to preserve the balance in the relationship. Thus, raising the voice and becoming angry is not only inconceivable, but when they are confronted, for example, the part of outside visitors, it is unsustainable: ” The level of aggression felt could compare to that of a punch in the face to us. ”
With a double effect: the person will not only have to heal the “burn” of the anger they received, but also soothe the “fire” of his own reaction. For the Balinese, ” the words are like a bridge which unites two continents “. It should not be separated.
And at us?
Animism in legacy
In this island of Indonesia, Hinduism, majority religion, still bears many traces of its animistic origins, and retains, as the inhabitants of the island, a close link with nature. It is ubiquitous in the culture, particularly through the many offerings daily, which ” open the way to the beauty of the gods “.
Adolescence is considered to be more of the period of self-assertion, more or less strong, where time is often not the choice of words, on the contrary. But even after that, in our society, where assertiveness is seen as a quality, jousting verbal are rather valued, even if it is at the expense of the other… and to the detriment of the relationship.
Remember that we are responsible for the words that we issue may be an interesting exercise daily, and have a real impact on our surroundings.
Similarly, when the words that we receive shock us, offer a space before reacting can avoid the ” put out the fire “…